Bobby Petrino’s Pimp Hand Is Strong

The best prostitutes on the planet can’t spit out O’s as well as he can.  He started out coaching under Mike Price, yes, that Mike Price, before he took a gig with the Atlanta Falcons, only to make out, like a thief in the night, 13 games in on his first season.  He wrecked his motorcycle which exposed an affair he was having with a collegiate athlete while coaching Arkansas.  In turn, he was publicly shamed and lost his job.   Perhaps, you’ve heard of the guy.

The guy is clearly a liability. Most coaches would never get another opportunity after running out on a professional organization and embarrassing a collegiate program a couple fo years later.  Bobby Petrino isn’t most coaches though.

He likes to fling it, both literally and figuratively. He’s really, really, REALLY good at it, too.  So good, in fact, that he just accepted a head coaching job at Louisville.  Less than two years have passed since he publicly shamed an entire state.  Yet, he has already been trusted to run another program.

The man drinks heavily.   He enjoys prostitutes.  He meddles in extramarrital affairs.  He embarrasses his employers.  He humiliates his family.  He pisses off most of the coaches that ever worked for him.  However, recruits love him.  Quarterbacks love him.  Receivers love him.  Hell, his wife still loves him.  He has a way of manipulating secondaries in the vertical passing game just as he does his women.

Good for you, Coach Petrino.  I admire your work.  Both on the field and off.  Merica.  Fuck Yeah.

  • “To err is human, to forgive, divine.” ~ Alexander Pope
  • “We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” ~ Plato
  • “Life is short, break the rules.  Forgive quickly, kiss slowly.  Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably.  And never regret anything that makes you smile.” ~ Mark Twain
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