I Am A Magician With A Bottle Of Wine

I have become increasingly suspicious that women are just using me for my alcohol.  It usually begins midday with a random text from a lady that is likely bored to death and has nobody else to text.  A few messages later and we have likely settled on dinner at my place.  Throughout the day we will continue to exchange some witty banter via text message or email.  Before you know it the lady is knocking on my door.  We will say hello and exchange a few pleasantries and fake compliments.  We will sit down on the couch and have a glass of wine.  I will tell a few obnoxious stories and inappropriate jokes.  We will then have another glass of wine.  She will talk and talk and talk and talk.  I will have another glass of wine.  We will likely begin to playfully touch one another as we chat.  We will then have another glass of wine.  She will begin to flip her hair, bite her lips, or drop subtle sexual hints. We will have another glass of wine.  At this point, it becomes increasingly obvious that nobody wants any dinner.  She only came for the wine.

  • “Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” ~ William Shakespeare
  • “If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.”  ~ Marilyn Monroe
  • “We love the things we love for what they are.”  ~ Robert Frost
Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s