Extra Time

Sweat drips. Calfs pound. Countless hours. Clock wound. 

Eternity within reach. Mustering focus and grit. Heartbeats collectively accelerate. This is it.

Calculated chaos. Preparation unfolds. Certainty to panic. A sight to behold.

When seconds last hours. Men become boys. Factions are selected. Billions ride on a toy.

The balance of life. One anointed. One relieved. 

Donald Sterling: The REAL Story

Magic Johnson had already bitten off all of his fingernails.  He sat lonely in his office flipping back and forth between playoff basketball games.  He tried to make himself watch baseball, but he just couldn’t.  Owning the Dodgers wasn’t even going to change that.  He needed to breath basketball again…

Donald Sterling is a Jewish attorney from Chicago.  So let’s be clear, he is likely a racist old bastard.  However, I’m not going to speak about anything he may, or may not, have said in the privacy of his own home.  Not only is it not my business, it isn’t even relevant what any company owner says in their own homes.  If we are all being honest with one another, we are all bigots for a moment or two each and every week.  Before we start casting stones, let’s take a look at how this alleged recording was obtained.

This lady in question is obviously a gold digging ho (the wife confirms she is, in fact, a gold digging ho).  I don’t think anyone will question that though.  Donald’s wife is currently suing the whore for extorting $1.8M from the family.  The whore also has over 100 hours worth of additional recordings in her possession.  If you follow someone around for months on end, it is likely you will catch them saying something.  Hell, ask any woman that has looked through my phone and she will claim to have found something…

The real story here is the power play that Magic Johnson has made here.  I’m not sure if he paid the gal or if his asian backers are paying her, but it’s pretty obvious Donald has been setup.  The two supposed pictures in question are of Magic Johnson and one of his own players, Matt Kemp.  How convenient.

Further, the news broke during the playoffs.  The Clippers will tank from here ensuring outrage in LA (inevitably $$$$ lost for Sterling) and eventually lead to Sterling selling the team.  Hell, Magic even has his buddy Obama commenting on the issue.  How convenient.

Less than 2 days after the tape surfaced, Magic has already confirmed that he will do the league a favor and buy the Clippers.  How convenient.

At the end of the day, most knowledgeable sports fans would rather see Magic running the Clippers than Sterling.  HOWEVER, the moment we start crucifying people for things they say in the safety of their own home is the day that the police state has become too much for me to bare.   Hanging people without a trial isn’t any cooler today than it was hundreds of years ago.

People should stop condemning Donald.  They should start commending Magic.  This was, in fact, his greatest assist, yet.  Sit back and enjoy the show.  This is just starting to get good.  I can only imagine it ends exactly as it did for Frank McCourt and the Dodgers.  Oh yeah, Magic and his investors just finished up doing this exact same thing across town…how convenient.

  • “The robb’d that smiles, steals something from the thief; He robs himself that spends a bootless grief.”~ William Shakespeare
  • “All human beings have three lives: public, private, and secret.” ~ Gabriel Garcia Marquez
  • “Solitude sometimes is best society.” ~ John Milton
  • “If you read someone else’s diary, you get what you deserve.” ~ David Sedaris

March Madness Marketing: Buffett’s Last Hoorah

Warren Buffett. He is a symbol of capitalism. Personally, I don’t listen to the guy much anymore because he is more or less a trophy wife. He is just paraded around to entertain the masses…With that said, I would like to tip my hat to the old bastard. He has made one of the most ingenious marketing plays I have ever witnessed. People will be piggy-backing this idea for years to come in some shape or form.

ONE BILLION DOLLARS. It does have a nice ring to it. All you have to do is pick every game correctly in the NCAA Tournament correctly. I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, but those odds sound pretty slim. Just the same, I am an avid believer in playing lotteries once the pot gets to $220Mish. At that point, you are actually purchasing discounted tickets, but that is neither here nor there. The flashy payout alone is sure to get millions of people to sign up.

Anyone that has ever played in a March Madness bracket knows that nobody is going to win. Therefore, there is no real risk of paying out anything. Further, I feel confident that Buffett assumed the risk via one of his insurance companies so he likely just collects free premium from Quicken. Let me break that down, Quicken gets TONS of free marketing for an insurance policy that will never payout. Buffet gets free publicity for taking Quicken’s money. Now, here’s the BIG kicker. Everyone that signed up to play MUST click the ‘accept ads’ button. Ta-dah. Quicken and Buffett have figured out how to pay themselves to market their product. Amazing.

PS. I made it 3 games before losing. Buffet would be proud as an Ivy League school (Harvard) insured I won’t be retiring next month.

  • “They say that nobody is perfect.  Then they tell you practice makes perfect.  I wish they’d make up their minds.”  ~ Wilt Chamberlain
  • “Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.” ~ John Wooden
  • “You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.”  ~ John Wooden

Bobby Petrino’s Pimp Hand Is Strong

The best prostitutes on the planet can’t spit out O’s as well as he can.  He started out coaching under Mike Price, yes, that Mike Price, before he took a gig with the Atlanta Falcons, only to make out, like a thief in the night, 13 games in on his first season.  He wrecked his motorcycle which exposed an affair he was having with a collegiate athlete while coaching Arkansas.  In turn, he was publicly shamed and lost his job.   Perhaps, you’ve heard of the guy.

The guy is clearly a liability. Most coaches would never get another opportunity after running out on a professional organization and embarrassing a collegiate program a couple fo years later.  Bobby Petrino isn’t most coaches though.

He likes to fling it, both literally and figuratively. He’s really, really, REALLY good at it, too.  So good, in fact, that he just accepted a head coaching job at Louisville.  Less than two years have passed since he publicly shamed an entire state.  Yet, he has already been trusted to run another program.

The man drinks heavily.   He enjoys prostitutes.  He meddles in extramarrital affairs.  He embarrasses his employers.  He humiliates his family.  He pisses off most of the coaches that ever worked for him.  However, recruits love him.  Quarterbacks love him.  Receivers love him.  Hell, his wife still loves him.  He has a way of manipulating secondaries in the vertical passing game just as he does his women.

Good for you, Coach Petrino.  I admire your work.  Both on the field and off.  Merica.  Fuck Yeah.

  • “To err is human, to forgive, divine.” ~ Alexander Pope
  • “We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” ~ Plato
  • “Life is short, break the rules.  Forgive quickly, kiss slowly.  Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably.  And never regret anything that makes you smile.” ~ Mark Twain